“Never neglect the opportunity to have an orgasm, if you can”
I mean, it’s possible.
Talking about female pleasure without being banal and stereotypical, it’s possible.
And I, who in 2015 no longer believed that it was possible.
(I know, in the meantime it’s 2016, let’s not be pedantic).
Although it’s true that more and more frequently (but never enough) we discuss gender issues, the fact remains that when a woman talks about sex, most of the times she’s viewed in a strange way – by both men and women (and the author of the book, alas, confirmed it).
The issue is that for every strange look there is a girl who is trying to explore this world, to explore herself, at least beginning by asking herself questions.
Therefore we are in need of something that helps her understand more about this reality, without having to constantly defend herself against all the negative judgments that usually go hand in hand with a sense of guilt such as “I should not be thinking about my pleasure, it’s not right, a woman should not think about it”.
This something exists: it’s called Pop Porn, it’s written by Valentina Ferri, illustrated by Elena Triolo and published by Hop Edizioni (and the main sponsor is La Valigia Rossa). Miss(Tress) Moon has a blog which tells the readers all the secrets of pleasure, from sex toys to aphrodisiac food, also talking about sensual playlists and technical jargon.
Angelina is a girl who follows her blog and tries to put Miss’ suggestions into practice, finding herself more often than not in tragicomic situations as she, compared to our beloved Carries Bradshaw, is everything but perfect. She is a normal girl.
The feature that I likes the most about this book is that every girl, depending on the subject matter and their own experiences, can relate to it in one way or another.
Here are the 5 reasons why you should run to your closest bookshop to buy a copy of Pop Porn (or try to win one! How? I’ll tell you later).
1. GOODBYE STEREOTYPES
The woman is fragile and submissive, the man is assertive and determined.
To move away from this binary scheme is possible, but it comes at a high price.
For example, a man who doesn’t like to command and let the woman take control, is often misjudged.
Well, just to jump straight into the mood of the book, this is one of the first drawing that Elena gives us:
MissTress Moon has a toy boy on a leash, of whom we only see his fashionable clothing and a tattoo that reads: “strong”.
An image who’s massage is so straightforward that no explanation is needed.
2. GENDERBLIND AND COLORBLIND
“Do you have a he, a she, multiple hes and multiple shes?”
It’s just one of the many questions that Miss asks taking for granted that heterosexuality is just one of the multiple sexual orientations (which, I remind you, the WHO defines as natural variants of human behaviour).
One should never think that a woman must necessarily focus all her attentions to a man (or only one man).
And where words don’t do it justice, there comes the drawing, for example introducing different ethnicities.
3. THE IMPORTANCE OF CONSENTING
In the book she talks about BDSM, the dark room, pissing, areas of wax play (okay, I had to Google this), but she never forgets to highlight the most important rule: always be consenting. In addition, talking about sexting she focuses on how to take photos that can’t be used for revenge porn. In short, she talks about what really happens between people when they explore the sexual sphere, without lying or decorating it with bows.
The experiences aren’t always good or safe. One must say this and then give some advice on how to protect oneself.
4. CULTURAL PILLS
Wikipedia, stand aside.
This book is a treasure chest of knowledge: from porn cinema (find the link to watch the first porn film in history. It was in 1908 and I assure you that it’s a real treat), to porn books, to vibrators, going all the way to the “Manuel de civilité pour les petites filles à l’usage des maisons d’éducation”, written by Pierre Louys in 1917.
“Quand vous vous êtes servie d’une banane pour vous amuser toute seule ou pour faire jouir la femme de chambre, ne remettez pas la banane dans la jatte sans l’avoir soigneusement essuyée.
Pendant le sermon, si le prédicateur paraît croire à la « pureté des jeunes filles chrétiennes », ne vous mettez pas à pouffer de rire.”
Moreover, there is also a chapter on the most diverse sex toys and on how to build some at home, for a “homemade” pleasure.
5. LOVE ONESELF
Sex doesn’t discriminate, not even numerically. You don’t need to be in two (or more than two) to experience pleasure. Above all, to take care of oneself, one just has to love oneself.
Of course, one likes to make oneself pretty for someone else. But this doesn’t mean that one can make oneself pretty just for themselves.
And in the book we find suggestion on lingerie to wear not necessarily for someone else.
(“I really like the idea that you learn to go to sleep with a sexy lingerie set […] it’s a game, even if solitary”) or on cooking recipes (“Whether you are planning on inviting someone over for an evening based on porn or if you are staying alone, food is extremely important”).
At the centre, above all, there is us. And it’s a great feeling.
BONUS
In the book there’s a so-called “Actually corner”, a section dedicated to letters to the post, where Miss replies to (invented) emails containing very diverse questions.
Well, thanks to The post of the clitoris, the experience can go beyond the book.
An email account was in fact created to which one can send his/her doubts, being sure that MissTress Moon will give us her opinion.
Of course, it’s not a perfect book (some of the rules on what you should of should not wear are a bit far-fetched), but it’s definitely a breath of modern and courageous fresh air in the publishing scene which is still too behind from this point of view.
And exactly because we liked it so much, we asked the Hop Edizioni to send us a copy of the book so you can win it.
If you leave a comment under this article by the 11th January telling us what intrigues you the most about this book, you may be picked and win a copy of Pop Porn!
Good luck and happy reading!
